First of all, I apologize for being gone so much. It hit me pretty hard to lose my only grandfather and then break up with my boyfriend. Which I did get over since I am into someone new.
Secondly, this going to be the start of a new series of posts that I'm going to call, "A Piece of Advice"!
I picked to call it that since it's simple and it goes with PandaSweets. Get it?
Like you get a piece of candy which is a sweet? Errr..... -.- *Ahem*
(I am so sorry for being weird.)
Just to note, my advice is from my personal experience and I am not making you take my advice.
*Results may vary from person to person*
"A Piece of Advice" will have different kinds of advice.
Some will refer to relationships, liking someone, school, life, etc.
Honestly, "A Piece of Advice" will only be posted when I do come up with something. Since I don't want to just search the internet and post whatever I found.
So, "A Piece of Advice" will pretty much always come from my own experiences or from people I know.
Okay, Let's get on with the actual piece of Advice! :D
So to start off, this "A Piece of Advice" will be about Break ups.
Since I did just get through one myself, I decided this will be the first topic.
Break ups are hard, whether you're the one being broken up with or the person ending things. As for me, I was the one who broke up with my boyfriend of 2 years and about 5 months.
Just so you guys can know just how badly I took the break up, I'll tell you how our relationship all started. Which was on none other than, facebook.
Yes, I am stupid for adding people I didn't really know but at least me and him had a mutual friend. (Whether or not this is the case, it's bad and can lead to bad things and events. I was lucky.) We actually met in person when we decided to watch the first part of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. (Sorry, this is going to be a pretty long post to make up for being gone so long.)
Anyway, he didn't ask me to be his girlfriend until after a couple of times of him walking from his house to my high school. There, he hung out with me during paste-up (Yes, I was in my high school newspaper for 2 1/2 years). During the second day he visited, it was time for everyone to go home. The date was December 8,2010. While he was walking me to my school's front door, he turned to me and asked, "Alyssa, would you be my girlfriend?" and of course I said, "Yeah, sure!" I hugged him and I was so happy that I finally had someone who cared for me, other than family and close friends.
After our first anniversary, I decided to finally tell my mom that I was dating someone. This was hard for me to do because all that time, I was lying to her face about where I was going and with who. My reason for lying to her was, I thought she wouldn't let me date him. Which is a stupid reason since she can't actually force me to break-up with him.
Okay, fast forwarding to our second year of dating (I finally knew we were pretty serious) I told my whole family about our relationship, that happened when they all met him at my graduation party. Well, eventually everything settled down and we were over the whole, "Honeymoon" phase and according to Wongfu Productions' video, "Strangers Again", we were at the stage "Comfortable". I let that comfort make me drift away from him. I say that because, I started to not care about how much we talked on the phone or what we did when we saw each other, which wasn't that often.
The beginning of this year, which was going to be our third year of dating, we were at "Stage 5: Tolerance". Why? I was the one tolerating him. I knew deep in my heart that he deserved someone better than me. I always told him whenever we got into a fight. No, we weren't one of those couples who "broke up" when ever they had a fight. We always worked it out some how. During the end of March and beginning of April I started to realize that I didn't feel the same way any more.
May 8, 2013 12:30am. He was the one who actually encouraged me to break up with him over the phone instead of text. (Yeah... I'm that person. The person who's too scared to break up with someone in person.) I told him I didn't feel the same way and that I wanted to just focus on school. He told me how he felt. But he accepted it. The thing that hurt me the most and made me start crying was the fact that he wanted me to delete all of out pictures together and how he just basically wanted to disappear from my life. I however wanted him to still be in my life just not as my boyfriend. Right then and there I was okay with it, but then I would be reminded that I broke up with him and suddenly tear up. After a week, I had the urge to just text him and have a conversation with him. But I knew I couldn't.
So, now that you guys know how our relationship went, here's some advice for those of you going through a break up or even thinking of breaking up with someone.
- Make sure you're breaking up with someone for the right reasons or for good reasons. If you're going to break up with them because they forgot to text you ONE TIME, don't. Just talk it out and ask them why they didn't respond. If you do end up breaking up with them for that kind of reason, they might now be willing to get back together with you.
- The most important thing to do when getting over someone is to move on. It's hard at first I know, but you will be able to do it.
- Allow yourself to move on. What do I mean by this? I mean, don't keep calling your ex or just sit there and think about good memories you had with them. If it helps just think about a little bit about the bad memories.
- When you move on, don't forget, not everyone will like you back. Just keep moving on.
- Listening to music can effect you and the way you feel. When you just got out of a break up, it's okay to listen to depressing music for the first week or month or how ever long you need. Just make sure when it does become a month after, listen to happy or upbeat music. It helps especially if there's a funny music video to go with it.
- Getting over someone requires you to get out of the house and hang out with your friends. Why do people say things like "Bros before hoes"? Well, its because close friends will always be there for you no matter what. When you guys hangout, go to places like the mall so you can look for a new guy or the movie theater to watch a new funny movie that just came out or whatever you like that your ex didn't.
- If you ever see your ex with some other girl in public, and this will happen eventually, do not and I repeat, DO NOT go crazy and charge over there and give them a piece of your mind. Why? That's because you will only make yourself look crazy, obsessive, and really jealous. If you're with a guy friend, ask him if it's okay to pretend that you two are going out and make it seem like you two are the happiest people on earth. If you're with a friend that's a girl, just go into a store or walk the other way. Remember, DO NOT go crazy.
Okay, I am so sorry if none of my advice helped you. These are just things I did to get over my ex. Like I said, whether you're the one being broken up with or if you're the one ending things, a break up is still a break up and it still hurts. Honestly, this is the last thing I had to do to fully get over my ex. I am not saying that relationships that start on facebook or other social media sites don't work out because some times they do. For example, my friend Olivia and her fiance Brock met online and are now getting married! :D
*As stated before, results my vary from person to person*
Hope this helped you guys!
P.S. Sorry about any grammar mistakes or spelling. I was in rush to go to sleep. ;)
Alyssa <3
